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| Marjorie June (8th grade graduation) |
Marjorie June grew up during the depression moving from farm to farm and living sometimes with extended family. She enjoyed the occasional dogs and cats that wandered unto their place and dreamed of getting married, having a family, and living on a farm of her own.
Her father was a seed-corn dealer, and as a young woman it was
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| Marjorie June (HS graduation) |
common for her to help out in the fields as needed.
Vanity?
I'm not sure she had time for such thoughts, stylish clothes or even a mirror to consider all this.
Vaseline on her eyebrows and lips and a little face powder were her only makeup applications.
She met my father at a church gathering and fell in love before he left to serve in World War II. Letters were written and a relationship made more precious by the country's circumstances was formed. Mom made a wedding dress out of white wool and waited. Dad returned home with a silver medal and a gold star--perhaps a somewhat changed man. Vows were exchanged in a simple ceremony.
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| Mr. and Mrs. |
After a brief honeymoon, they moved to the family farmstead. Used furniture filled the house; however, a new bedroom set which included a chest of drawers, a bed with head and end boards, and a vanity with a mirror the width of the dressing table were purchased.
She must have felt like a princess--
married to a veteran,
living in the country
with her own dog,
and a new bedroom set
with a vanity to boot
in the old farm house.
In my earliest memories of the vanity,
I see a matching hand mirror,
brush and comb--
all placed on a doily
which covered the
always shining surface.
And, nothing else.
The front drawers held personal items--
a bundle of letters from her husband written
while he was over-seas, nightgowns, and socks.
Only dressing-up on Sunday mornings, I see her checking her reflection in the large mirror. Was the vertical line on her hosiery straight? Was her slip showing? And, her hat, was it at the right angle; should she pull the netting over her face or shift it back over the hat?
As a soon-to-be-mom, I picture her in the early morning--
after her husband has gone out to chores--
looking in the vanity mirror and studying
the changes in her young body as her pregnancy progressed.
Months later,
I visualize her sitting on the bed
holding a new born
and staring at this
new image of herself.
A mother with a miracle.
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| A two year old and a three year old. |
A year, then another, and yet another slipped by. A nicely framed picture of the family children settled in one spot on her vanity along with products from the Watkins man, socks needing darning, and a pattern or two. A cluttered surface that no longer needed dusting.
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| My brother and I with a new brother! |
The surface items evolved as one year lapsed into another to include a stack of diapers neatly folded, Sunday School lessons, and an updated picture or two of what was happening in the family.
When Mom was busy with the cleaning, baking, and meal preparation in the kitchen, the important papers were shuffled into their bedroom and unto the vanity. I wonder if she ever took time to ponder her image and wonder what she had gotten herself into.
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| And, then, there were four... surrounding Grandpa Harry. |
The only time the clutter disappeared occurred when Aunt Gladys visited from California. In my eyes, Aunt Gladys, my mother's only sister, was a woman of the world. Within an hour of her arrival, her suitcase would be plopped on the bed in my parent's bedroom with her seated on one side and me on the other and the question, "Want to see my shoes?"
I'd slip on her shoes, drape her colorful outfits across my shoulders and dream of growing up and owning fancy outfits of my own. I remember studying the two of us--our reflections--as we shared the suitcase contents.
As I grew older, I would ask my mother, "Can I use the mirror?" It was the only full length mirror in the house. Entering the bedroom, I would close the door part way not wanting to draw the attention of any of my five brothers.
Was my slip showing?
Did my hair look right?
Did this blouse and skirt really match?
Standing on my tip-toes,
I wished my legs were longer.
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| A Sunday morning picture, another brother, and a new baby. |
The vanity stayed cluttered, but the contents continued to change over the years. The Watkins man stopped coming to our house; the Avon lady took his place. Tubes of hand lotion (buy one/get one free), miscellaneous birthday and anniversary cards, pages torn from magazines with articles worth keeping blanketed the matching brush, comb, and mirror set along with a smattering of the boys' school pictures and a stack of cloth diapers--always neatly folded.
One year folded into another.
The family picture changed.
My parents moved off the farm and into town.
The furniture went with them--
including the bedroom set they bought as newly weds.
The most recent family picture was moved to a new spot--a bookshelf in the living room--along with numerous pictures of the grandchildren.
The vanity surface now supported a box of tissues, miscellaneous items bought on sale from the local dollar stores, new books ordered through the mail, and a prescription or two.
The yearly Thanksgiving and Christmas gatherings passed--with a houseful of conversation, food, and energy for a couple of days and then quiet again in my parents' home. Decades passed. The family grew. We had to sit on the floor amongst the grandchildren's blocks and books. The only quiet place was Mom and Dad's room with the visiting coats stacked high on their bed.
Mom was diagnosed with a rare cancer in her eighties.
Who did she see now when she looked in her vanity mirror?
What did she remember?
What were her thoughts?
Did she even take the time to look?
She said little.
I came to stay for a week before her death.
Her appearance no longer mattered.
Daily, she wore the same clothes and shoes
and shrugged her shoulders when asked
a question.
After helping her into bed one night,
I scanned their bedroom. As usual,
my mom was a "stacker," and clutter reigned
--except for the top of the vanity.
One picture remained--
my college graduation picture.
Although filled with furniture, her wedding dishes and silverware, her many books and magazines, the house felt empty after her death. Months later, Dad decided to try assistive living and told us to take what we wanted. Although there were a few antiques of value, I wanted only the vanity with the large mirror that had witnessed so much of life.
Now taking residence in my home, my mom's vanity holds my pajamas, my socks, and my favorite CD's. The surface displays a picture of my husband and me and is often dusty.
And,
whenever I take time
to look into that large mirror,
I
see
me
and
remember
her.
Man is like to vanity; his days are as a shadow that passeth away.
Psalm 144:4
Micah, a book in the Old Testament with only seven chapters, asks a significant question in Chapter 6,
verse 8: . . . what does the Lord require of you?
To act justly
and to love mercy
and to walk
humbly
with your God.
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Thank you, God, for Moms.
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Cynic? Me?
